throw away those love sticks

I'm sick, very sick

coughing for the 4th..day
i cant sleep for 3 nights in a row..
coughing till my chest and my stomach muscle hurts now
whenever i cough..

i have this crackling sensation everytime i breathe which is annoying yet scary
caused by the huge amount of phlegm in my lungs.

i have sinus every morning and worst till, i cant breathe at night,

my chest feels like there is pressure everytime i breathe..

its my second visit to the doctor, and she comfirmed that my sickness was due to my smoking habits.

immediately, i came home turned on my mac and started researching about
quiting smoking.

i am smoker, not a heavy smoker but yeah sometimes i tend to loose control of

myself and smoke like hell alot.. plus shisha which is equally bad for health
i always had an excuse in the book to continue to be a smoker.
i would always say "my uncle is already in his 50's and he is a heavy smoker and he is still alive and healthy" or my grandfather used to be a smoker and he smoked till his death at 80"

so i continued to smoke.it was a huge part of my life, it was my social life, my alone time and my stress times.

its hard to live without those sticks, my friends are smokers
what am i gonna do when im out with them? watch them smoke?

i know its difficult to quit smoking.
but i gotta think of my future and health
i dont wanna die young in my mid 30's 0r mid 40's or even mid 20's!!
i still have many things to achieve..i wanna build a family, i wanna be rich before
i reach the age of 40, i wanna enjoy my wealth after 40,i wanna live to see my great great
grandchildren,etc.

There are several lessons i've learned from several situations i've gone tru
Our beloved friend Andrew who has left us at the age of 20 taught me that life is so precious that we don't know when are we gonna leave the world, that life is unpredictable and unexpected.
and due to my sickness now, omg its so suffering i tell u. aihs..

i don't wanna experiance this shit anymore.

and the reason for this post today is to make sure and remind me, sorta like a deal
for me to quit smoking.

R.I.P Andrew

Andrew if you hear me, I'm sorry for my delayed visit's till i didnt even have the chance to see u when you're still breathing. everyday is a tomorrow till you're gone and now it means nothing.


i finally saw u laying peacefully at your home yesterday. i hope you're in a better place now.
your dad seems to be accepting it and he's still very strong, and so is your brother.Im not sure about your mum, but i saw her breaking down into tears yesterday.
your friends were all there, every single one of them paying their final respect to you and to see you for the last time ever.


altho we're not that close i remember our childhood times as you're my neighbour for over 20 years . I remember all those memorable RVN football moments with you.


it's still hard to accept the fact that you're gone and im still in disbelief and shocked.


whenever and wherever you are now, i hope you're in a better place now watching down on us.


rest in peace Andrew, you'll never be forgotten.

New gadgets =D

I have a fetish for Apple gadgets
got myself the new Apple keyboard =DD

love it or hate it, its just beautiful

hang in there man

Let's all pray for Andrew
Djians, Rvn's all we can do is pray and hope he will be alright.